There is nothing wrong with being a person focused on attention to detail, appreciating the finer things in life or enjoying the success of high performance in your personal or professional life.
However, if you find that you are someone striving for perfection in everything you do, you could actually be holding yourself back from achieving more, trying more and enjoying more, as a result.
Confidence in women is already often too rare a trait, so to balance the fine line of overconfidence is tricky – but actually, perfectionists are often less confident than they may come across.
Perfectionism is defined as the refusal to accept any standard less than perfection. In some instances, this is attainable – but in most, it is not.
Too often, perfectionism is a result of high self-criticism that results in low self-esteem and provides an inferiority complex that others may understand to be a superiority complex! In short, it can make you less likeable to others even when achieving more, and it won’t help build your own confidence.
Those who follow perfectionism may believe to do so is healthy, and in some situations, it can help boost standards and performance. However, perfectionism is something that can quickly spiral out of control and cause even the most confident of women to second-guess themselves, their decisions, their work and the people around them.
Instead of pitting what we perceive to be a weak woman vs. a strong woman, or to analyse questions such as “why are women jealous of other women?” “how can I outperform other women?” or “why can’t other women meet my standards?”, instead we need to work on our own behaviour and loosen up a little. To do so isn’t just beneficial for us – it’s beneficial for all women!
So, how can you do this? Read on…
Battle Your Inner Critic
Perfectionists often struggle to meet their goals because they have to get one thing just perfect before they can move on to the next.
Realistically, this is rarely the case. There are lots of things in life you’ll never feel ‘ready’ for. Ask anyone with children, and they’ll tell you there is no such thing as ‘ready’!
Sometimes you have to accept circumstances and move with them; go with the flow as such. You’re more than capable of learning as you go. Holding down that inner-critic that’s telling you not to until everything is just right, is self-care – and you’ll be surprised at how quickly positive change can happen even when things aren’t running at 100%!
Say No When You Need To
As women we are often overly conditioned to say ‘yes’ to things that we don’t really want to, don’t really enjoy or don’t really hold any interest in.
Perfectionists tend to have high ambition but taking on more when you are already overwhelmed will only cause your perfectionism to increase. If something isn’t right, say ‘no’. Not every opportunity has to be grabbed with both hands and not every change or move needs to happen. Trust your gut and set boundaries.
Keep Goals Realistic
Adjusting standards isn’t comfortable for perfectionists, but it is necessary. Document exactly what is needed, what is acceptable, and what would be considered great for any situation – and work towards the first. Reach acceptable… and then consider how much more needs to be done. If you can, let it go, and if not, strive to reach a couple of points under the ‘great’ heading. You’ll probably find the reception to the work or decision just as positive, but it will have involved much less stress and anxiety for you!
Keep Moving
Perfectionists need a good reason to move off of one task and onto the next in order to stop refining it and continuing to try and reach perfection on it.
Set yourself deadlines for things to be completed and closed or set timeframes to work on each thing.
Lock your phone or computer or whatever necessary after this time period so that you’re unable to continue stressing over the small stuff. Ensuring you have good reasons to move onto the next thing can help stop you getting hung up and spending unnecessary time and effort on whats already done.
Perfectionism isn’t an easy habit to lose, but the benefits will be noticeable once you start to loosen your grip.
Remember: part of what makes women strive for unattainable perfection is pressure from society, and you are not a Stepford Wife… you’re a brilliant, flawed, beautiful human woman.
Comments
Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I really appreciate your efforts and I will be waiting for your further write ups thank you once again. Flor Rowney Justine
Thank you, you’re welcome to join our community too where you can receive weekly emails from me where I share insights on these type of topics.
Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to make your point. You obviously know what youre talking about, why throw away your intelligence on just posting videos to your blog when you could be giving us something enlightening to read? Cookie Jakob Hole
Thank you for the feedback!
Excellent beat ! I wish to apprentice while you amend your website, how can i subscribe for a blog web site? The account helped me a acceptable deal. I have been a little bit familiar of this your broadcast provided bright clear idea| Lana Reinwald Emyle
Its great as your other blog posts :D, appreciate it for posting. Valaria Barrett Beach
Thank you x
Thanks so much for the post. Much thanks again. Really Cool. Cecil Cornall Charlet
Thank you x
Pretty! This has been an incredibly wonderful article. Estrella Alfonse Allain
Thank you x
Great delivery. Great arguments. Keep up the great work. Janaye Oby Donal
Thank you x
I gotta bookmark this web site it seems very useful very helpful Agace Andrey Downs
Thank you ?
Hello. Great job. I did not anticipate this. This is a splendid story. Thanks! Wren Bondon Dehnel
Thanks Wren x
I located this article really interesting. I enjoyed reading your viewpoint on it. I understand that others will certainly appreciate it. I am most likely to share it with a few of my good friends. I would certainly like to see more short articles from you on this subject, please? Addi Ethelbert Evangeline
Hi Addi. Make sure to subscribe to my blog so you do not miss any new articles related to this topic.
It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I have read this post and if I could I want to suggest you some interesting things or suggestions. Maybe you could write next articles referring to this article. I wish to read more things about it! Sibley Currie Bremser
Hi Sibley. Make sure to subscribe to my blog so you do not miss any new articles related to this topic.
I am now not positive the place you are getting your information, however good topic. I must spend some time studying much more or working out more. Thanks for magnificent info I was looking for this information for my mission. Janice Brendon Dale
Glad the content helped you.
After exploring a handful of the articles on your website, I seriously like your technique of blogging. I book-marked it to my bookmark site list and will be checking back soon. Take a look at my website as well and let me know your opinion. Violante Lennie Rasla
Thank you x
Some genuinely choice content on this web site , saved to my bookmarks . Ardis Humfried Esther
🙂
Attractive section of content. I just stumbled upon your website
and in accession capital to assert that I acquire actually enjoyed account your blog posts.
Anyway I will be subscribing to your augment and even I achievement
you access consistently fast.
Thank you.?
thanks abc thanks thanks article
quality and beautiful content
Thankyou