Why Don’t People Like Me? Let’s dig a little deeper…
We all know that not everyone we meet in life is going to like us or want to become our bestie! But, this doesn’t make it any less upsetting when you’re faced with this scenario.
When this happens, it’s very easy for your subconscious to slip into negative self-talk and start identifying reasons why you’re not likeable, and what you could do to change yourself in order to receive the approval from others.
It’s difficult to realise that it’s OK not to like or be liked by everyone. After all, humans are social creatures and we all need support and connection from one another.
So, what is it that makes us feel so unliked and unworthy?
We tend to feel this way due to needy behaviour and self-doubt, so it’s imperative that we’re able to ask ourselves “what is needy behaviour, and how can I lessen it affecting me?”.
It’s time to hold up that mirror and reflect it upon yourself with patience and grace.
From here, your like-ability and interactions with others can become healthier and more mutually beneficial.
Check out these top tips that will help you overcome feeling this way:
5 Tops Tips On How To Combat Feeling Unliked
Remember: we all act out of our own insecurities
When someone else displays rejection toward you, their behaviour is not simply about you – although they may attempt to frame it in this way. We all act out of own insecurities and experiences, and these don’t always translate to kindness or acceptance of others.
The behaviour of others is as much about them, if not more, than it is about the person they are aiming it toward.
So don’t threat when someone comes across as stand-offish or impersonal – who knows what’s going on inside their own head that’s making them act in that way.
Stay humble. Stay real
When we’re not feeling self-confident, it’s easy to revert to attempting to behave in a way that impresses or pleases others.
This answers the question of ‘what is needy behaviour?’ – it is attempting to change yourself to fit with someone else… but should you, really?
It can be a tough journey to not be a ‘people pleaser’, but staying true to your own values and personality is much more attractive. And along the way, aligned with your own truths and beliefs, you’ll begin to notice the ‘needy friends signs’ in others.
This is your chance to be humble and support others in the way that you once needed.
When it happens, let it happen
No value can come from holding onto past rejections. If or when you are rejected, forgive and move on.
Whilst you don’t need to forget what has happened, (and you will certainly learn from it), it’s important to leave the past in the past, and focus instead on nurturing a healthy future relationship instead.
Actively listen
Relationships are as much built on listening as they are speaking.
Showing interest in other people and encouraging them to connect with you builds a solid foundation for which a healthy, happy relationship can flourish.
As you grow more aware of relationship behaviour, you’ll start to notice the needy friends signs you once exhibited, in others – and often they’ll speak, ask and share with you considerably more than before.
Yay… you may soon realise that you were never ‘not liked’ after all!
Stop Beating Yourself Up
It’s never possible to please everyone – take a look at the love/hate relationships that many celebrities attract!
People pleasing and worrying about what others think of you is the beginning of the end!
You’re never going to live up to everyone else’s expectations, so don’t even go there.
The greatest changes begin when we look at ourselves, and become aware of what’s making us feel in need of other people’s approval. This in turn encourages us to self-reflect and ask the question ‘Why don’t people like me?”.
The best thing you can do when negative self-talk begins, is to find balance, stay mindful, and build your own self-confidence.
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